No Money, Mo' Problems

Our family had an expensive summer. A very expensive summer. 

First, we spent an obscene amount of money trying to save our "other firstborn", Chloe. It did not occur to us that she was dying until about 3 hours before we had to put her down, and we thought that at only 5 years old, she was worth every penny it took to get her well again. How much did we spend? Let's just say that we feel better thinking of it as roughly $1 per day of the 5 years we had with her. If you've never fallen utterly and completely in love with a dog, this probably sounds insane to you, but dog lovers understand and know we'd spend it all again if it could bring her back. Sidenote: If your kids want to know how to become filthy rich, guide them towards a career in veterinary dentistry.

 

Chloe: Cat Lover. 

 

Tell me you wouldn't go into debt for this.

Then, we got a new puppy. Seamus was another shelter mutt, so he was not exactly pricey, but there are always expenses that you forget when you're falling in love with a fuzzy ball of cuteness (who just happens to be on death row). Vaccines must be procured, license fees paid, and chewed-through Macbook power adapters(!) replaced. 

Then, just for good measure, our water heater broke. In spectacular fashion. Six weeks later, there are still soggy boxes in the garage that I can't bring myself to deal with. Yes, I know they're not going away by themselves, but, well, I'm procrastinating. FlyLady would not approve, but I'm okay with that. By the way, do you know how much a 50-gallon water heater costs? Even when you buy from the "scratch-n-dent" pile? A s#!tload of money, that's how much. 

*Insert adorable picture of flooded garage here*

Oh, yeah--and we had a kid. A girl. So, it's not like the expenses are going to stop anytime soon.

Bottom line: We've got to get frugal. Like, way frugal. 

One good thing: we're refinancing our house (Why? Let's just say that when the re-fi goes through, we can celebrate with a pineapple upside-down cake.). Unfortunately, our other debtors are less inclined to knock a few hundred bucks off our bill every month, so it's time to start cutting some significant corners. 

Dining Out. New-parent laziness combined with having way too many awesome, reasonably priced eateries within a five-mile radius of our house allowed us to get into a nasty habit of eating out. We only went out on weekends, but when you eat out all weekend long, it gets super-pricey. Yeah, we knew that already, too, but it's amazing what extended sleep-deprivation will allow you to rationalize ("But this place isn't expensive!", "But we cooked at home all week!", and "But Ellie looks so cute; we should really let other people see her in this outfit!" have all counted as perfectly valid excuses to eat at one Gilbert's many, many delicious-yet-moderately-priced" restaurants). So, new rule: we can only go out to eat once every two weeks. ::dusts off hands:: Next!

Starbucks. What? You thought fancy coffee counted as "eating out"? Ha! You obviously have not had a baby in the last 10 years. To a new parent, Starbucks is a triple-threat: It's highly caffeinated, it's freaking delicious, and it's EVERYWHERE YOU ARE. It's at the grocery store. It's at Target. I'm pretty sure they're building one inside our laundry hamper. However, I have figured out how to make lattes in virtually any amazing flavor (details below) without a $900 espresso machine (though I would gladly accept said machine if anyone's giving them away--Oprah, I'm looking at you). I have also recently been turned on to the wonders of Maca Root, which gives me a boost of afternoon energy when needed (it tastes so nasty I literally gag through it, but it's breastfeeding-friendly, so...). Anyhow, fancy coffees: once a month or, even better, not at all!

Extra Income. Still thinking about this one. We would sure dig out of this hole a lot faster if we could find a way to make some extra income, but we already both work full-time, so our options are limited. I've started making and selling hairbows and tutus, but I have found that, for the most part, this has just been an added expense. I've bought a ton of materials, took a class, and made a bunch of super-cute things to sell, but I just don't know what to do next. Do I go bat-poo crazy and stay up all night making enough stock to open up a stand at a farmers' market or something? Sounds like a lot of fun, but that costs more money. But I love it. And I want so badly for it to work. Ugh, I don't know. 

Anyway, I'm hoping that blogging about some of this stuff will help us 1) find support amongst other "broke folk" and 2) stay accountable. Got any money-saving tips/encouragement? Make yourself a cheap, delicious latte and holler at your girl. 

Cheapskate Vanilla Lattes

Ingredients:

2 cups of your favorite milky-type product (we use 1% or organic soy milk)

2 tsp (+ or -) of vanilla extract

4 tsp (+ or -) of your favorite sweetener (agave nectar works great, but fructose is my favorite)

2 cups of double-strength coffee (to achieve this, just double the coffee:water ratio you usually use)

Whipped cream  (totally optional, but definitely makes you feel fancy)

While your double-strength coffee is brewing, warm up everything else in a small saucepan on the stove (low-medium heat should do you fine, and for goodness' sake, don't let it boil!). Throw two shots of espresso's worth of coffee (6 oz?) into a big ol' mug, then top off with the flavored milk. Add whipped cream if you don't still have baby weight to lose.

Fun flavors!

Mocha:

Stir 2 tbs. (+ or -) of unsweetened cocoa powder into the milk mixture. Proceed as usual.

Pumpkin Spice:

Stir 2 tbs canned pumpkin, and 2 tsp of assorted pumpkin pie spices (cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and clove) into the milk mixture. Proceed as usual. 

Coconut-Mocha (I'm weird; I like coconut in everything):

Replace 1/2 of the vanilla extract with coconut extract. Stir 2 tbs. (+ or -) of unsweetened cocoa powder into the milk mixture. Proceed as usual. If you really want to get fancy, whip your own cream and add another splash of coconut extract to that. Kapow! 

You'll notice there are a lot of references to (+ or -), and other vague instructions. This reflects not only my laziness about measuring, but also the customized deliciousness that you can create if you just play around a little. I'm sure there are other fun things you can do with this, but I'm not going to list my hypothetical experiments here as gospel recipes.